20 Best funny quotes and sayings ever

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Here are best 20 quotes and sayings just for laughs. I post these Famous funny quotes related to this world and your life.

“When a woman says ‘WHAT’, it’s not because she didn’t hear you.

She’s giving you a chance to change what you said. ”

“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”

funny quotes

 

“It’s always fun listening to someone’s lie when you already know the truth.”

“Some husbands hold wife’s hand in malls because, if they leave her hand she’ll go for shopping
it looks romantic but actually it’s Economic.” 

 

 

“I don’t care what people think of me. At least mosquitoes find me attractive.”

“My Fantasy is having two men at once, One Cooking, One Cleaning.”

“It’s funny how when I m loud, people tell me to be quite,
but when I m quiet, people ask me whats wrong with me.”

“Don’t Grow up it’s a trap”

“I really need a day between Saturday and Sunday.”

“When I was Young I was scared of the dark.
 Now when I see my electricity bill I am scared of the lights.”

“We all have that one skinny friend that eats more than a fat Person.”

“A jealous woman does better research than the FBI.”

“I love it when someone’s laugh is funnier than the joke.”

“Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” – Frank Sinatra

“In heaven there is no beer…
that’s why we drink ours here.”

best funny quotes, funny quotes

“My parents should be proud of me because
I’m addicted to Facebook not to drugs!!”

 

 

“Doctor please tell me boy or girl? I want to update status on Facebook.” 

 

 

“Whenever I have a problem I just sing,
then I realize my voice is worse than my problem.”

“When I’m SINGLE, all I see are couples being happy.
When I’m DATING someone, all I see are singles being happy.”

“Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock…”

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